SWOT Reading Example: M and K

SWOT Reading: M and K

Situation:  M wanted a reading on the relationship between her and her sister K.  M says K has always been passive-aggressive towards her, gossips about M to their mother, makes a point to ignore M on social media, and rants about wanting to hurt M to M’s nephew.  M wants this reading because she would like to know why this is happening and if it is fixable so she can decide what she would like to do with the relationship.


Strengths of the relationship:  Princess of Swords (thoughts and ideas, gossip, new information to process, bright young person); Five of Pentacles (number 5, misery, low self-esteem, temporary feeling of deprivation, possibly lack of money); Four of Swords (number 4, resting after an illness, the need to retreat from the world, allowing an issue to be reconciled over time); and Two of Pentacles (number 2, balancing the good and bad parts of life, moderation, mood swings, indecision).  These cards do not look like strengths on the surface.  However, the last two cards in this spread strongly suggest the issues between M and K are close to working themselves out if given time.  This spread also suggests one or both sisters does a lot of needed processing during the periods of time when they don’t speak.  The dynamic between the two sisters is a strange one.  An outsider looking at the situation would assume K is the more powerful sister because she is the bully, but this spread indicates M has all the power when she leaves the situation.  M’s departure from the dynamic even affects K’s self-esteem.  This dynamic has played out for so long that neither sister seems to know how to relate to the other without it.

Weaknesses of the relationship:  The Tower (number 16, destruction of parts of self no longer needed, painful experience that results in liberation, destruction in order to move forward, outbursts that promote honesty); Knight of Cups (creative action and imagination, idealized expectations of love, easily hurt and moody, lacking initiative, indecisive); Nine of Swords (number 9, depression, things not as bad as they seem, a clear head is needed to solve a problem, self-knowledge needed); and Three of Swords (number 3, sorrow, release of painful memories, unresolved emotional upset, grieving).  This spread tells me the relationship has been downright painful for M and she may not be able to forgive and forget.  She feels upset, betrayed, angry, sad, and ashamed when she thinks of what went on between her and K.  I get the feeling K is growing up a bit and wants to move on, but I don’t think it will be that easy for M.  M will have to let the past go if she wants a relationship with K, but that would mean opening herself up to the possibility of getting burned again.  Also, M is used to being the victim in this relationship and may not be able to change that pattern.

Obstacles of the relationship:  King of Cups (water sign male, intuitive and passionate, can be secretive about revealing feelings, potential to be ruthless, hiding vulnerability); Queen of Cups (water sign female, compassion, easily hurt, someone who lives in their own world, intuition, being flooded with emotion, shows feelings easily); Six of Cups (number 6, past memories, nostalgia, childhood patterns, working through old emotional issues, someone from the past creating trouble in a relationship); and the Ace of Swords (number 1 or 11, cutting away the unnecessary, karma, thoughts becoming clear).  This spread immediately tells me M and K do not trust each other and K started targeting M because M used to wear her emotions on her sleeve.  However, M has become secretive in the past few years and has become too guarded to see any genuine attempts on K’s part to break the ice.  I also think the third person implied by the Six of Cups is their mother.  I wonder if either sister has questioned what the mother gets out of allowing the backstabbing to happen between her children.  The King of Cups represents not only M’s suspicion and unwillingness to trust K, but also K’s husband.  I get that he somehow fuels the rivalry between the sisters.  The Ace of Swords applies to M becoming wiser to what happened in the past, rather than feeling victimized by it.

Threats to the relationship:  Wheel of Fortune (number 10, positive change, natural life cycles, the need to be open, using an opportunity in a positive way); Queen of Cups (water sign female, compassion, easily hurt, someone who lives in their own world, intuition, being flooded with emotion, shows feelings easily); Princess of Wands (energetic young person, creativity, new projects, initiative); and Queen of Pentacles (earth sign female, kind and practical person, keeping up appearances, being selfish or ambitious).  This relationship is based on appearances, rather than the sisters speaking honestly with each other.  Although there are ample opportunities to change this pattern, neither sister seems to be on the same page when these chances present themselves.  K sees M as overly emotional, even though this has not been the case for a long time.  M sees K as opportunistic and shallow, even though most of M’s opinion has been colored by anger at K’s actions.

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mark 5

SWOT Analysis: To Be or Not To Be?


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